I know it’s been a while and there is a reason for that, one which I’ve been contemplating talking about for so long. My mental health has been at it’s lowest ever point recently. The reason I’m writing this post is I want to talk about something I’ve been struggling with for the last couple of months.
I know so many people, close to me and not, who struggle with their mental health on a daily basis. Whether that be with anxiety, depression, bi-polar or any other form of mental health illness. However, I never thought that I would be that person. I know it sounds so bad to say but I always grew up thinking “That’ll never happen to me, I’m a happy person” or so I thought.
See, 4 months ago I was diagnosed with Depression. For months I knew there was something not right. I was always down but I couldn’t quite figure out why still to this day I don’t know why. But that’s what I wanted to talk about, sometimes there isn’t always a reason why sometimes it’s just a because.
So many people have said, “Sure how could you be depressed, you’re only 22.” “You have a great job” or “You have a wonderful family” and why yes I’m not denying any of those things. Sometimes your mental health just takes a turn, it doesn’t care what life you’re living or what job you have, it just changes. No one knows why it just happens.
And when it happens it’s so lonely, even in a room filled with people who love you, I never knew I could feel so alone.
A lot of the time what you see people portraying on social media is so far from the truth of their real-life, heck, those of you who follow my socials I bet would never have guessed what was going on.
People say that a picture can paint a thousand words, I believe a picture can hide a million thoughts. I’m going on a bit of a ramble now, basically, what I wanted to say to you reading this is, I know what it feels like. I’ve cried my tears, I’ve had my dark thoughts. I know. And although it may not seem like it now. it gets better, I promise.
I’m still not 100% the happy girl I once was, heck I don’t know if I’ll ever be fully her again but what I do know is my eyes have been opened. I still have my bad days where I don’t want to leave my bed or talk to anyone but I do it because the world will still turn even if I don’t.
One more thing, if you notice someone close to you being quieter than usual or acting differently, reach out to them. Sometimes all it takes is a simple “hey, how are things?” from someone to get them talking and get them on the right track to feeling better. No one wants to be left in the dark, and honestly, that’s the only way I can describe depression is darkness.
Remember! There is no shame in asking for help. It’s okay not to feel okay.
I will leave all my socials down below and if ever you need to talk, I’m just a message away ❤️
My self-care posts: 5 Self Care Tips
If you ever need a chat: Instagram: @louisecorbally_ Twitter: @louisecorbally_